New Year, New ME?

Wow! It has been a while since anything has posted to this blog.  I wish I could wrap up in a nice brief statement the simple reason why.  I can't.  I can start off by saying that this blog has been ignored because I am disobedient and a coward.  Coward, mostly covers it.  Several years ago I began a journey to heed God's calling on my life.  I have met Him at every turn calling me to be a speaker and writer.  I am comfortable in that place in my own skin with my own ideas, but promoting myself to others is a hard thing to do. I worked at it for a short time and didn't meet with a windfall of success.  Fear of rejection overpowered me.  Sometimes "life" just takes over. These are not good excuses.

In the time that I have been away from this blog, a lot of life has happened.  I am still a working mom, but that does not consume me.  I still chase after all of my kids activities and am always sitting on the sidelines cheering them on, but that does not consume me. I have become physically healthier and actually somewhat enjoy the time that I spend running, but that does not consume me. What does consume me and stirs me to the core of my soul in the middle of the night, is to serve God as He has called me.

2 Timothy 1 tells me not to be afraid and serve the Lord. Verses 6 and 7 (NIV) say "For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline." So, here I am to fan the flame.  To practice my writing and storytelling skills. To share what God has been showing me in the time I have been away from this blog. I will pray for boldness and waive off fear of rejection. I hope you will pray for me too.

The question in the title of this post asks if a new year means a new me? No. I am the same imperfect person with faults and fears.  I can't "resolve" to make myself over or new.  What is new in me is a desire to follow God more closely, to be obedient to His calling and live in His strength for His purpose. Through Him, I can do all things.....even be brave enough to write again and promote a speaking ministry.